Tuesday, June 9, 2009

page 11

hey hey :)
many many many things happen already. from LT camp till today.

5th June 09

i saw the girl i love la. Cecilia Cletus, yeah. But oh well. Pat and Cor were the only friends i knew there. Got also la yang i know but not close. They did something so disgusting. Not gonna tell. Arrive in Pace Bane,Papar bout 1 like that cant really remember. I hug her and said i loved and missed her. Dont really think she heard me la cause' she didn't reply me. I went " okay ? ". Then got session session like the usual. Check into our rooms. my roommates were totally unknown. I don't know them at all, till we became friends. Bradley memang friend but not close. Austen Bagiu ! My main man. I make friends with him we became great friends. His awesome. And oh yeah there's Arthur something i don't know. His weird,nevermind that. HAHA. Didn't really spent time with Cecilia cause' she was with her friend only. Dudes and Dudettes that knows me yeah. you guys know i don't like that right ? So yeah. SLEEP.

6th June 09

Woke up. Found Cecilia. Said good morning. Yeah the normal greetings to everyone. Still half dead that. So tired. Session session again. Got warm up. Dance dance ! Praise and woship so totally awesome ! Hell yeah. Here's the bad part la. At exactly 5.33pm evening. I went to counseling downstairs (act as if you know), then i went up to go Confession. After Confession, as i was walking to the door, Noel (awesome dude) and Priste (uhh,funny la) walk in. Noel gave me a letter and said

Noel : Bernard,letter from Cecilia.
Priste : *hug* Got a really sad news for you man. Sorry.

Bernard : *thinks* *sigh*
from then on i knew she wanna break up la.
Bernard : * in my heart i said * *fuck* (sighs more)

she wrote .

Bernard, blah blah blah something about chemistry blah blah blah bullcrap bullcrap
it's not you, your nice blah blah blah romantic blah blah blah... I'M SORRY!

At first i went like " can't you say in person ? like a normal human being ? Cause' like dude, i ask to be with you in person. " But sometimes we just have to let somethings. I was DEVASTATED. Really no idea what to do. Lost at a moment. But in the end i went like. " Oh fuck it " She breaks with me, she has her life now. Became emo a bit la. sing so crazy emo shit songs. Ask Austen my man! Haha. Since then,i cant stop thinking of her. Not a single second. Nothing can compare to this. Nothing. But I'll be okay :) Gotta stay positive. it's not like i'm staying any longer at least not till 11. Yeah umm. didn't sleep at all. Slept at 5am. Haiz. But i dont really care anymore.

7th June 09

Woke up at 6am (one hour of sleep only) brush teeth. Still emo-ing. Then i kept talking to Austin. Counselor that ! Haha. Pat help me out a lot too. And Cornelius wap! Got again la another story to that. I sat with Austen the whole day. Cause he no friend. He had to sit in front cause he kena caught sleeping in another room TER la TER. Praise and Worship was AWESOME in the last day. Cant really imagine or think that time. My mind was soooo disturb and sad. Things at home arent well, Mum is arent well, then kena break again and all la. I let it all out! Shouted sing praises to God. Hmm :) i miss that warm feeling. i gave back Cecilia all her stuff. Necklace and letters. I went to camp to meet her. But she cant even spent time with me. I even wanted to kiss but instead i got broken. Ah fuck it. Her type yeah couldn't hold onto guys more than a minute. I'm gonna punch the Puncher so hard ! Haiz. Start singing Remembering sunday all the way back home to KK. Got off and to the place i call home. RELIEVE !

8th June 09

Ahh. That scent in the morning never felt better. I love being with my family again. But,it got ruined again by the thoughts of her. Haiz. Can't really stop yet. Visions of me being with her still is in my mind. Just by reading all this posts i have written right ? hahaha. I've been fooled again.Then at night my paip in my toilet broke ! HAHA. So funny this. My dad and francis did the hard part i just did the screwing thats all. Cause my hand and fingers small ! Sial ! If only got pictures this ! Haha. Cant wait for IUday.

Well,thats all what happen to me these few days. Those to have help me like Jae, lil dino , Austen , Pat , Josh , Kim and all. Thank you for being there for me. Love you guys.
AIGHTS! Cheerios !

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